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... of hell

"One toke over the line, sweet Jesus, one toke over the line
Sittin' downtown in a railway station, one toke over the line
Waitin' for the train that goes home, sweet Mary
Hoping that the train is on time
Sittin' downtown in a railway station, one toke over the line

Who do you love, I hope it's me
I've been changing, as you can plainly see
I felt the joy and I learned about the pain that my mama said
If I should choose to make it part of me
Would surely strike me dead, and now I'm"

he who makes the beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man...

God has gone easy on the beasts... you ask why?.. well... they probably dont have visions of their late girlfriend screwing around.... lucky bastards...

He is a bastard you know... whats the score... you **** yourself.. kill yourself and than youre probably up to take devils shits for the ******* eternity... well the reality hurts god damn it... will i risk it... is there peace... or is there eternity of devils mockery of my fucked up fate that partly i created... shall i kill myself... is there a ******* exit out of this nightmare.... will this pass.... came to calm.... shall i roll the dices... risk it all...

what a **** are we doing out here in the middle of the desert... someone call the police we need help... we need help... we need heeeeeeeeeeeeelp!!!

the truth!

truth?

the truth is that i filled my stomack and my brain with fucked up combination of alcohol and serious antipain drugs... can i hear the god sayin take the ticket... take it... take it... is this the crossing.... i need that ticket right???... whats the score.... whats next....

oh yeah... maybe i could forget that devastating picture in my head... can i... am i that strong... that forgetable... that foolish... did i forget all of the earliest fucked up pictures that i witnesed in this 27 years of this so called life.... of course not... they are always there to hunt me when moment is right... ****... i saw two human beings letting their souls out... one of them ive holded in my hands.... someone would think thats something fucked up... noooo.... that cant hurt you.... that is something natural, something that is final achievment of us all, something that nature does to us when it is full with our stupidity... and that is all allright.... this is something different....

for years ive wondered what is the devil up to when i die... is there any kind of physical torture that so many pictures from dark ages show... from my perspective that will never hurt that much than raping your soul... whatch from that... when someone or something or some event begin straching your soul all over the place... when you are affraid of closing your eyes couse you will be left alone looking at full moon unable to fall to sleep yelling "oh god, oh god, oh god".... but there is that sadistic monster call god... why would you punish me when i give up... why would you judge me from one moment of my own weaknes... who the **** you think you are... have you tried this pain... can you judge if you havent... cant you show mercy if you have... is it so much to ask to rott peacefully in fuckin coffin... just dont touch me... leave me alone....

anyway... there is some small signs of mercy from the great fucker... in order to divert my mind to somethig else, ive been watching something called "fear and loathing in las vegas"... great shit.... and player was set to repeat this fucked up movie on and on... thank you for that my lord ;) ... those unearthly screams from people high on all kinds of drugs helped me quite a bit... just a taste from hell... shame there is no sulfur smell... it would go just fine with the mood....

for the end my former signature...

A drug person can learn to handle such things as seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to deal with this trip.

shame i changed it

there is a way to cause a world of pain to the person that did the shits that make me feel this way... should i cause a world of pain... should i devastate her... nooo my friends... it is to low... lower than this state... lower even then me.... but this toughts have crossed my mind and i feel no better.. i feel ashamed actually.... sinked even deeper...

when the truth is found
to be lies
and all the joy
within you dies...

im no more capable of writing.... head is to heavy....

ahhh... just one joke that brings smile to my face....

- Can i call you a cab?

- And i call you a cocksucker!!!:lol:

note to other moderators... feel free to lock or even delete this mumblins... this is just another report from venture to the world of major dissapointments ;)

note to others.. you dont even have to read this shit... live your little lives as you think you should.... we will all end on one place... or the other ;)

bastards...
 
......go ask alice.....i think she'll know....when logic....and proportion....have fallen softly dead.....and the white knight is talking backwards....red qeen's off with her head.....remember......what the doormouse said......feed your head.....feed youre head.....

nice....wt can i say....ive seen it for....million times....****....wish i was in that trip some times....theres a book too...writer is hunter h tompson.....same name....cheapest one is about 6.5$ on net ofcourse....u cant find it in this shitty hole....

its late nad im tired....i shto koji moj q pishem na stranjskome.....

how much do they pay u to screw that bear?
 
d1:
... of hell

"One toke over the line, sweet Jesus, one toke over the line
Sittin' downtown in a railway station, one toke over the line
Waitin' for the train that goes home, sweet Mary
Hoping that the train is on time
Sittin' downtown in a railway station, one toke over the line

Who do you love, I hope it's me
I've been changing, as you can plainly see
I felt the joy and I learned about the pain that my mama said
If I should choose to make it part of me
Would surely strike me dead, and now I'm"

he who makes the beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man...

God has gone easy on the beasts... you ask why?.. well... they probably dont have visions of their late girlfriend screwing around.... lucky bastards...

He is a bastard you know... whats the score... you **** yourself.. kill yourself and than youre probably up to take devils shits for the ******* eternity... well the reality hurts god damn it... will i risk it... is there peace... or is there eternity of devils mockery of my fucked up fate that partly i created... shall i kill myself... is there a ******* exit out of this nightmare.... will this pass.... came to calm.... shall i roll the dices... risk it all...

what a **** are we doing out here in the middle of the desert... someone call the police we need help... we need help... we need heeeeeeeeeeeeelp!!!

the truth!

truth?

the truth is that i filled my stomack and my brain with fucked up combination of alcohol and serious antipain drugs... can i hear the god sayin take the ticket... take it... take it... is this the crossing.... i need that ticket right???... whats the score.... whats next....

oh yeah... maybe i could forget that devastating picture in my head... can i... am i that strong... that forgetable... that foolish... did i forget all of the earliest fucked up pictures that i witnesed in this 27 years of this so called life.... of course not... they are always there to hunt me when moment is right... ****... i saw two human beings letting their souls out... one of them ive holded in my hands.... someone would think thats something fucked up... noooo.... that cant hurt you.... that is something natural, something that is final achievment of us all, something that nature does to us when it is full with our stupidity... and that is all allright.... this is something different....

for years ive wondered what is the devil up to when i die... is there any kind of physical torture that so many pictures from dark ages show... from my perspective that will never hurt that much than raping your soul... whatch from that... when someone or something or some event begin straching your soul all over the place... when you are affraid of closing your eyes couse you will be left alone looking at full moon unable to fall to sleep yelling "oh god, oh god, oh god".... but there is that sadistic monster call god... why would you punish me when i give up... why would you judge me from one moment of my own weaknes... who the **** you think you are... have you tried this pain... can you judge if you havent... cant you show mercy if you have... is it so much to ask to rott peacefully in fuckin coffin... just dont touch me... leave me alone....

anyway... there is some small signs of mercy from the great fucker... in order to divert my mind to somethig else, ive been watching something called "fear and loathing in las vegas"... great shit.... and player was set to repeat this fucked up movie on and on... thank you for that my lord ;) ... those unearthly screams from people high on all kinds of drugs helped me quite a bit... just a taste from hell... shame there is no sulfur smell... it would go just fine with the mood....

for the end my former signature...

A drug person can learn to handle such things as seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to deal with this trip.

shame i changed it

there is a way to cause a world of pain to the person that did the shits that make me feel this way... should i cause a world of pain... should i devastate her... nooo my friends... it is to low... lower than this state... lower even then me.... but this toughts have crossed my mind and i feel no better.. i feel ashamed actually.... sinked even deeper...

when the truth is found
to be lies
and all the joy
within you dies...

im no more capable of writing.... head is to heavy....

ahhh... just one joke that brings smile to my face....

- Can i call you a cab?

- And i call you a cocksucker!!!:lol:

note to other moderators... feel free to lock or even delete this mumblins... this is just another report from venture to the world of major dissapointments ;)

note to others.. you dont even have to read this shit... live your little lives as you think you should.... we will all end on one place... or the other ;)

bastards...
Kliknite za proširenje...
jesil ti luda il da?
 
With a bit of luck, his life was ruined forever. Always thinking that just behind some narrow door in all of his favorite bars, men in red woolen shirts are getting incredible kicks from things he'll never know.....
 
Whoever and whatever had hurt you so bad to write these things?
So she-he's gone and that's it. No more lies. No more pain. Feel happy that it's so.
But nooo, you must continue to bash your head against the wall and think no more pain... when it's you that's making it.
I'm sure you'll feel much better after a cup of strong hot cofee and some soda to get rid of the hangover. Of all the venom and bad things that had evaporated from your head. Hopefully.
Think happy thoughts. Knock your shoe tips and keep repeating: There's no place like home... there's no place like home...
:lol:
 
Čovek se uputio prema centru trga. Kolena su mu klecala a pogled usmeren u zemlju. Pokušavao je da sakrije svoj strah od znatiželjnih sugrađana. Pokušao je da održi dostojanstvo, ali zabrinuti pogled zabrinutom oku nije mogao da ulije nadu. Ruka svetog Marijina je jasno nacrtala nemoć bogova. Teška vremena su već tu. Mesecima već kiša nije pala i suša se uvukla u Njen Grad. Njen Grad je živeo od kiše. I on je bio taj koji je morao da prenese poruku sveca sugrađanima.

Kosi je više ležao nego sedeo ispred krčme. Umoran od svega. Nekada skupo odelo koje je nosio prikazivalo je tragove proteklih meseci. Fleke blata i krvi. Slavni zabavljač odavno nije zabavio nikoga. Pomno je pogledom pratio sveštenika, ocenjujući svaki njegov korak, svako njegovo rukovanje, svaki njegov gorki osmeh, pokušavajući da nasluti njegove krajnje reči. Sveštenik je letimice pogledao Kosija, zastavši na sekundu. Pogled u kome se jasno prepoznavalo beznađe najednom se pretvorio u pogled pun mržnje, a zatim panično odšetao dalje. Uplašeni ljudi su slušali.

„Dragi prijatelji. Danas je ruka svetog Marijina prikazala da su Bogovi uz nas. Pokazala je njihovu zabrinutost i saosećanje. Ali i njihovu nemoć. Velika trojka je nemoćna pred željama Bulina, Boga vatre.“ – masa se uzburkala. Bulin već dugo pokušava da se dočepa Njenog Grada i da ga povuče u svoje kraljevstvo. Sveštenik je nastavio – „Visoki sveštenik je pitao Bogove ko je kriv, i ruka je napisala. Zatim ju je zapitao ko je spasitelj i ruka se nije pomerila.“ Kroz zabrinuta lica prošao je grč užasa. Više nije bilo dileme. Kraj slobodnog života se bližio. Samo je pitanje vremena kada će se Njen Grad pretvoriti u grad zatrovan opojnim gasovima i ljudima bez svoje volje. Užas se pretvorio u izraz beznađa a zatim mržnje. – „Ko je krivac?!“ urlikala je gomila. - „Znamo ko je kriv, i ko će biti kažnjen, i kakvu kaznu će trpeti.“ reče sveštenik povišenim glasom, „ON“ viknu i uperi prstom na mesto gde je do pre koji minut sedeo Kosi.

Kosi se mirno pojavio na čistini u obližnjoj šumi. Njegov zanat ga je naučio sitnim trikovima i znao je kako da ode a da to ostane neprimećeno koristeći senke. Bio je svestan svoje krivice u razvoju događaja ali je morao da prati svoju sudbinu. Razbijeni prsten u njegovoj torbici ga je podsećao na ranija vremena, srećnija, savršenija. Prsten je bio magičan nekada, umeo je da prepozna takvo prstenje, ali nikada nije saznao čemu tačno služi. Čudnom igrom slučajnosti razbio se onog trenutka kada je doneo odluku da ode od nje. Ruke su mu zadrhtale i duboki uzdah je narušio tišinu šume. Osećao se sigurnim od progonilaca, seo je ispod jakog hrasta i izvadio frulicu. Svirao je sebi za dušu poznate note koje su nekada dirale njeno srce i njene strahove činile mizernim. Ponovo je razmišljao o tim danima, tražeći razlog, tražeći suštinu. Znao je da je učinio pravu stvar kada je otišao. Znao je da bi poludeo da je ostao. Znao je da nešto tu nije u redu. Sled događaja je bio zastrašujuć. Devojka koju voli je jedna od Bulinovih miljenica, i neretko se dešavalo da njegov uticaj prekrije njene misli. Tada su je prožimali strahovi i sumnje, ali je uvek svojim glasom uspevao da otera demona. Kako se desilo da nestane vatra ljubavi to nije znao. Kako je postala tako bezobzirna, ravnodušna. Kako je mogla da ga iskorišćava na tako odvratan način. Ne, morao je da ode.

Izvadio je polomljeni prsten iz torbe i stavio ga na prst. Balansirao je najveći deo krhotine i krivio glavu da pogledom ne vidi delove koji nedostaju. „Ovako izgleda ceo“ pomislio je i setni smešak se pojavio na njegovom licu. Zbog tog prstena sada je progonjeni. Od trenutka kada je razbijen kap kiše nije pala. Skinuo je ostatak sa prsta i vratio u torbu. Pala je noć, okrenuo se i zaspao nemirnim snom.

Probudio ga je oštar zvižduk. Uspaničen, naglo je ustao i pokušao da kroz mrak primeti izvor zvuka. „Da li su me našli?“ pitao se, ali šuma nije odavala nikakav znak aktivnosti. Još nekoliko trenutaka je osluškivao i zurio ali ništa nije primetio. Seo je nazad i opet čuo zvižduk. Ovaj put, činilo mu se, mnogo bliže, iza njega, odozdole, iz torbe. Skinuo je torbu sa ramena i primetio da svetli nekim slabim plavičastim sjajem. Otvorio ju je i video svetlost iz krhotina prstena kako se probija kroz šare koje su se pomerale bacajući svetlost na njegovo lice. Momenat kasnije svetlost se skoncentrisala na njegove oči u trenutku ga zaslepljujući. Instiktivno je zažmurio, sklonio pogled sa prstena i otvorio oči. Sve je bilo zaslepljujuće plavo oko njega. Opet je trepnuo ali rezultat je bio isti. Nakon nekoliko sekundi, oči su mu se malo privikle i mogao je da razazna sobu. Još par treptaja i video je vodu koja se sliva sa zidova sobe. Ne. Zidovi su bili voda. Stajao je u sobi oivičenoj vodenim zidovima. Vazduh je bio pomalo sladunjav ali vrlo svež. Pitanja kako, gde i nećete se ljutiti ako neću su mu se vrzmala glavom stihijski se prepličući sa pokušajima da shvati šta se dešava. Kao da to nije bilo dovoljno, jarka svetlost je kružila sve većom brzinom oko sobe, dobijajući na snazi svakom rotacijom. Bio je siguran da se nešto približava. Predosećaj mu je vikao „BEŽI“ ali nije imao gde. Ogromnom silinom nešto je izletelo iz zida sa desne strane i nije se razbilo u levi. Svetlost je nestala a u sredini sobe stajala je silueta. Zatekla ga je potpuno nespremnim, sa licem koje nije znalo šta ga je snašlo. Svaki mišić na licu je bio zgrčen u pokušaju da prikaže osećaj koji je stizao iz mozga. Mozak je nasumično slao strah, paniku, zbunjenost i bio je apsolutno siguran da je nespreman za sve ovo. Nakon nekoliko trenutaka prepoznao je siluetu devojke i malo se primirio zadovoljan barem jednim uspešnim poslom.

Devojka reče: „Ne boj se Kosi, na sigurnom si barem za sada. Nalazimo se u Njenom carstvu i ja sam izabrana da prenesem Njene poruke. Poruka prva glasi: „RECITE ONOM MAGARCU KOJI SE ODAZIVA NA IME KOSI DA ISKLJUČI GLUPAV MU MOZAK. NIJE IZABRAN DA RAZMIŠLJA I DA SE DURI VEĆ DA SE BORI. PA NIJE MU ORLIN DAO DEO SVOG GLASA I ONU SEXI FRULICU DA ON IZMIŠLJA GLUPOSTI NEGO DA MU POMOGNEMO DA ODBRANI MOJ GRAD OD ONE NIŠTARIJE BULINA.“

Poruka druga glasi: „NEMOJ DA SI SE USUDIO DA ODEŠ. AAAAHHHH GLUPI LJUDI. ŠTO JE KARDAN BAŠ NJIMA MORAO DA DA SVEST. A LEPO SAM MU GOVORILA DA SU MORSKE ZVEZDE PRAVI IZBOR. LUDAK....... NEMOJ MI REĆI DA SNIMAŠ OVO??? E LJUDSKOG GOVNETA MU.“

Poruka treća glasi: „SITUACIJA JE OZBILJNIJA NEGO ŠTO SAM MISLILA. SLUŠAJ PAŽLJIVO. KARDAN JE PRIMETIO BULINOV UTICAJ NA TEBI, PA VERUJEMO DA TVOJI STRAHOVI POTIČU OD NJEGA. SVE TVOJE SUMNJE KOJE IMAŠ PREMA NJENOJ LJUBAVI SU NJEGOVIH KOPITA DELO. PA MORAŠ SE SABRATI ČOVEČE. URADI SVOJ POSAO. NE DAJ MU DA ME POBEDI!“

Poruka četvrta glasi: „TEK SAD SAM SAZNALA DA NISI DOBIO PORUKE. TUPAVI MOBTEL JE OPET ZABRLJAO PA SAM MORALA DA ANGAŽUJEM SOPSTVENU POŠTANSKU SLUŽBU. NA ŽALOST, I ONI SU NEŠTO ŠTRAJKOVALI, KAO E-MAIL IM UNIŠTAVA POSAO PA SAM TO MORALA DA SREDIM.

A ŠTO JA TEBI TO UOPŠTE PRIČAM?!

ELEM. VIDIM DA SI UVIDEO KAKVE POSLEDICE TVOJE AKCIJE IMAJU NA MOJE POSLOVE. TIME ŠTO SI OTIŠAO SLOMIO SI SRCE A KADA SE SLOMI SRCE KOJE ČISTO VOLI U BLIZINI PRSTENA LOMI SE I PRSTEN. POŠTO JE SLOMLJEN PRSTEN JA VIŠE NEMAM UTICAJA U MOME GRADU I MOŽEŠ MISLITI KOLIKO SAM BESNA. BULIN JE VRLO BLIZU OSTVARENJA SVOG VEČNOG CILJA I UKLANJANJA MENE SA ZEMLJE.

EVO ŠTA ĆES DA RADIŠ. MORAŠ DA OBNOVIŠ PRSTEN. NJEGA ĆEŠ OBNOVITI TAKO ŠTO ĆE ONO SRCE PONOVO ČISTO DA TE ZAVOLI. I NE MISLI DA SAD KAD SE POJAVIŠ DA ĆEŠ BITI DOČEKAN KAO NE ZNAM NI JA ŠTA. U MEĐUVREMENU BULIN JE POTPUNO PREUZEO KONTROLU NAD TVOJOM DEVOJKOM I UNIŠTIO SVE ONO ŠTO STE IMALI. PATNJA KOJU SI PROUZROKOVAO MU JE ŠIROM OTVORILA VRATA I ON JE TO ISKORISTIO.

E SADA. STVAR JOŠ UVEK NIJE IZGUBLJENA. TRAČAK BIVŠE LJUBAVI JE JOŠ UVEK TU. ISKORISTI ORLINOV POKLON I BUDI PORED NJE. PRIČAJ JOJ MIRNO I MOŽDA NA TAJ NAČIN USPEMO DA UKLONIMO DEO PO DEO BULINOVOG UTICAJA.

PS. OBZIROM DA SI ISPAO BUDALA TREBALO BI DA IMAŠ DOVOLJNO INATA DA ISTERAŠ STVAR DO KRAJA. ZA SVAKI SLUČAJ KARDAN TI JE DODATNO OTUPEO I OVAKO TUPAVI MOZAK ČISTO DA NEPRIMEĆUJEŠ STVARI KOJE BI TI OMELE KONCENTRACIJU. UKOLIKO IMAŠ NEKA PITANJA ONDA NIJE URADIO DOBAR POSAO.“

Poruke prenete. Zapamti i spavaj sada“.

(to be continued...)
 
Where is the ritual
And tell me where where is the taste
Where is the sacrifice
And tell me where where is the faith
Someday there'll be a cure for pain
That's the day I throw my drugs away
When they find a cure for pain
Where is the cave
Where the wise woman went
And tell me where
Where's all that money that I spent
I propose a toast to my self control
You see it crawling helpless on the floor
Someday there'll be a cure for pain
That's the day I throw my drugs away
When they find a cure for pain
When they find a cure find a cure for pain
...
 
Tore open a package it was an empty box
No meaning to me just an empty box
Sender was a woman
Sender was a woman
She said she's sending me everything that I I I never gave her before
She said fill it up and send it back
Fill it up and send it back
So I send her back an empty box
A big mistake sent back an empty box
Half in the shadows half in the husky moonlight
And half insane just a sound
I crossed into a valley a valley so dark
That when I look back I can't see where I begin
I can't see my hands
I don't even know if my eyes are open
In the morning I was by the sea
And I swam out as far as I could swim
Until I was too tired to swim anymore
And then I floated and tried to get my strength back
And then an empty box came floating by
An empty box and I crawled inside
Half in the shadows half in the husky moonlight
And half insane just a sound in the night
Half in the shadows half in the husky moonlight
And half insane just a sound
 
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