Evolucija programera
Prikazujem rezultate 1 do 6 od 6

Tema: Evolucija programera

  1. #1
    Ističe se Zool (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    16.10.2005.
    Pol
    muški
    Lokacija
    Sabac
    Poruke
    2.210
    Reputaciona moć
    67

    Podrazumevano Evolucija programera

    AMD Athlon 64 3000+ s754;Kingston 512 MB;MSI GeForce 6600 VIVO AGP 8X;MSI K8T Neo s754;Maxtor 200GB;NEC DVD-RW 3500AG;Chieftec 350W;Philips 190S5 TFT 19"



  2. #2
    Iskusan codemaker (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    05.04.2004.
    Lokacija
    Beograd
    Poruke
    6.416
    Reputaciona moć
    0

    Podrazumevano Re: Evolucija programera


  3. #3
    Iskusan codemaker (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    05.04.2004.
    Lokacija
    Beograd
    Poruke
    6.416
    Reputaciona moć
    0

    Podrazumevano Re: Evolucija programera

    Sa istog sajta:

    The Goodtimes Email Virus
    Goodtimes will re-write your hard drive. Not only that, but it will scramble any disks that are even close to your computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice cream goes melty. It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, screw up the tracking on your television and use subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you try to play.

    It will give your ex-girlfriend your new phone number. It will mix Kool-aid into your fishtank. It will drink all your beer and leave its socks out on the coffee table when there's company coming over. It will put a dead kitten in the back pocket of your good suit pants and hide your car keys when you are late for work.

    Goodtimes will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your gas tank and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your current girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room to your Visa card.

    It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead. Such is the power of Goodtimes; it reaches out beyond the grave to sully those things we hold most dear.

    It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will leave libidinous messages on your boss's voice mail in your voice! It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.

    Goodtimes will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up. It will make a batch of Methamphetamine in your bathtub and then leave bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to chase gradeschoolers with your new snowblower.

    That is all, you've been warned.

  4. #4
    Iskusan codemaker (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    05.04.2004.
    Lokacija
    Beograd
    Poruke
    6.416
    Reputaciona moć
    0

    Podrazumevano Re: Evolucija programera

    Malo off-topic ali zgodno je...


    25 interesting things that you learn about computers in the movies...

    1. High tech equipment is often driven by a computer with a DOS prompt. (re: RoboCop)

    2. High tech companies don't do offsite backups of the data (re: Terminator 2)

    3. All media devices are readily available - ie If someone hands you a DAT tape with important data on it your PC will have a DAT drive.

    4. No matter what you ask a computer to do it will respond with a percentage complete bargraph - especially when searching for data it can accurately give you the time remaining until it finds that data.

    5. Data searching will always involve displaying all the searched data on the screen until a match is found - this is true of text and graphics such as fingerprints.

    6. Telephone calls can be easily redirected through places all over the world, and upon a tracea globe will be displayed complete with lines travelling between each place.

    7. Deleting of data always takes just a little less time than it takes the bad guys to knock down the door.

    8. Alltechnology is plug and play - every computer can have any piece of technology attached.

    9. High tech graphical interfaces are often driven by hundreds of keystrokes which do not appear anywhere on the screen.

    10. IP addresses automatically supply the feds with the physical address (ie log on and they know where you are!)

    11. Word processors never display a cursor.

    12. You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences. Just keep hitting the keys without stopping

    13. All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

    14. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical >interfaces.

    15. Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

    16. Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

    17. Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause temperatures in computers, > >just like they do in humans. After a while, smoke billows out of disk >drives and monitors.

    18. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

    19. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen.

    20. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward. (See #7, above)

    21. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.

    22. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.

    23. Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

    24. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

    25. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building.

    26. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a >backup file -- and there are no undelete utilities.

    27. If a disk has encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it.

    28. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by >any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all >computer platforms.

    29. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has. However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labelled.

    30. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.

    31. Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY-MP.

    32. Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.

    33. Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

    34. Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow down users.

    35. Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to.

  5. #5
    Iskusan codemaker (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    05.04.2004.
    Lokacija
    Beograd
    Poruke
    6.416
    Reputaciona moć
    0

    Podrazumevano Re: Evolucija programera

    A ovi mora da su poreklom sa nasih prostora....


    Three Apple Engineers and Three Microsoft Engineers
    Three Apple engineers and three Microsoft engineers are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three Microsoft engineers each buy tickets and watch as the three Apple engineers buy only a single ticket. "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks a Microsoft engineer. "Watch and you'll see," answers the Apple engineer.

    They all board the train. The Microsoft engineers take their respective seats but all three Apple engineers cram into a rest room and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the rest room door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on. The Microsoft engineers saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the Microsoft engineers decide to copy the Apple engineers (as they always do) on the return trip and save some money.

    When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Apple engineers don't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asks one perplexed Microsoft engineer. "Watch and you'll see," answers an Apple engineer. When they board the train the three Microsoft engineers cram into a rest room and the three Apple engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the Apple engineers leaves his rest room and walks over to the rest room where the Microsoft employees are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please..."

  6. #6
    Ističe se Zool (avatar)
    Učlanjen
    16.10.2005.
    Pol
    muški
    Lokacija
    Sabac
    Poruke
    2.210
    Reputaciona moć
    67

    Podrazumevano Re: Evolucija programera

    Goodtimes will make you fall in love with a penguin
    boles'
    AMD Athlon 64 3000+ s754;Kingston 512 MB;MSI GeForce 6600 VIVO AGP 8X;MSI K8T Neo s754;Maxtor 200GB;NEC DVD-RW 3500AG;Chieftec 350W;Philips 190S5 TFT 19"

Slične teme

  1. Trebam php programera
    Autor dado1 u forumu Programiranje
    Odgovora: 0
    Poslednja poruka: 08.01.2008., 22:07
  2. Tražim programera
    Autor xman u forumu Programiranje
    Odgovora: 0
    Poslednja poruka: 28.12.2007., 14:40
  3. Posao PHP programera!
    Autor Baba Višnja u forumu Arhiva
    Odgovora: 2
    Poslednja poruka: 23.08.2007., 11:28
  4. Evolucija programera
    Autor Zool u forumu Programiranje
    Odgovora: 4
    Poslednja poruka: 22.05.2006., 23:54
  5. TRAŽIM PROGRAMERA !
    Autor rpavlo20 u forumu Web dizajn
    Odgovora: 0
    Poslednja poruka: 04.03.2006., 16:53

Pravila za slanje poruka

  • Ne možete kreirati novu temu
  • Ne možete poslati odgovor
  • Ne možete dodati priloge
  • Ne možete prepraviti svoju poruku
  •